Love...

Hi again! Been a little bit but I wanted to ramble on about a little thing called love.

I'm currently in a long distance relationship. I'll admit, it does kind of suck. I love my boyfriend dearly but it hasn't been easy dealing with the pain of wishing he was here. He lives in England, in case you were wondering.

He is amazing. So sweet and caring. We never fight (surprisingly.) But, some might think we're crazy for staying together. We're about to celebrate one year of being together.

I've had two previous long-distance loves before my current man, so I think I'm almost an expert in this type of relationship. Honestly, I wouldn't recommend this type of relationship unless you are 100% serious about it. My first boyfriend and I broke up because of a LOT of issues related to the type of relationship we had. Of course there were other issues that stemmed from them, but no matter what way you saw it, it always returned to the long distance factor. We never got to see each other, we wanted different things, and we couldn't connect deeply enough for us to really want to make it work.

My second relationship was down right awful. He treated me like dirt. That was the main reason we broke up, but the distance thing was still there. As well as wanting different things.

Like I said before, I wouldn't recommend one. Here's a list of things to think about that could influence your relationship:

1. You'll most likely miss each other a lot.

While the saying 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' may be true in some cases, missing someone you love deeply can lead to depression. And if you can't see each other often, it can make things even worse.

2. It can be almost impossible to visit one another.

My boyfriend and I are about 4,000 miles apart. I live in Michigan and he lives in England. A plane ticket for a one way trip costs about $1300, depending on what airline you choose and what class you sit in. That's pretty much impossible for me to do because I'm currently between jobs and I also don't have a passport.

Though, your situation might not be as extreme as mine. You could even just be on a college campus that happens to be only am hour or two away from your lover, if that. While it may be more doable for most, between work, school, and a social life, it can be very difficult to set money aside, let alone time, to visit your sweetie every weekend or so.

Circumstances change, obviously, but make sure to consider that you may never see each other.

3. Infidelity.

Cheating isn't cool, no matter what type of relationship you have. If you honestly feel like you're going to cheat, either end things with your current partner or don't start them in the first place.

Long distance relationships are perfect for this. Someone can cheat on their partner with almost no threat of discovery.

Of course, not everyone does cheat, and I'm not saying that this will happen. It can happen with any relationship. The reason why I mention this? Because if YOU feel like you can't trust yourself or your partner to stay faithful in a long distance relationship, you shouldn't start one, no matter what you feel for them.

4. When you're in love, you tend to think things will just work themselves out.

"Oh! Look at all those military couples! If they can do it, why can't we?!"

Yes, the men and women of the military have pretty amazing partners back home. But even THEY deal with the issues that people often deal with in long distance love affairs.

What a lot of people don't realize is that it takes a lot more work to make it in a long distance relationship. Visits, time to talk... Its a lot on your shoulders. Whereas, when you see each other all the time, you don't necessarily have to plan so much out. It still takes work, but not as much in most cases.

People who get into these things just think that they can survive purely on their love. Most relationships fall apart because of that. And it can also lead to the other issues on this list.

5. You might be more compatible apart than together.

We all suffer from this. First impressions are everything. You may meet someone online and think they are the most awesome person ever, the sweetest, the best, etc. But when you meet them in person, they aren't all that you thought they were.

Compatibilities also change over time. You can be perfectly in synch with one another, then your plans change or your partner's plans change. Typically you wonder if you really want to be with this person without moving to be closer to them. Or, they just get on your nerves. What you want may have changed. Or, maybe even your feelings for them have changed. Things like this happen over time or happen after something difficult occurs within the relationship.

So, that's all I can think of for now. I'll do an updated blog post on this if I think of more.

My boyfriend and I are lucky. We've never seen each other in person, yet never fight, we're completely happy with one another, and just seem to get each other. We do plan to have him visit and eventually move to be with me here in Michigan, it just hasn't had the chance to happen yet.

Leave comments and suggestions for future posts! Bye!